Really Something Else

Really Something Else

Remove the ant-covered Mc Donald’s parking lot french fry from its beak, and a seagull is a soft soda pop bottle swaddled in the wings of an angel.

Where there are people there are seagulls.

Someone’s gotta clean.

Pro-tip #1:

Should you ever lose your group of humans on an afternoon hike, look to the sky.

Follow the squa… kyahs.. And you’re sure to run into some humans.

Pro-tip #2:

Should the gulls in a hover appear more like hang gliders in a giant synchronized goth version of Swan Lake; those are not gulls, or swans, or turkeys or vultures.

Those are Turkey Vultures.

A Turkey Vulture, despite what acceptable science tells us, are in fact Turkeys.

A larger, darker version with a significantly larger wingspan, which grows as part of the transformation into a subspecies known as The Zombie Turkey.

Pure terror. A demonic turkey with the wings of an eagle after a swim in a pool of hot tar.

Should you see one you’ll see at least five, even feathered zombies congregate.

Thank them.

Someone’s got to clean the highway.

Pro-tip #3:

Call the authorities. Find the nearest Mcdonald's (seagulls in the sky). Hold up there.

Should the self-serve soda machine lights start to flicker and the fryolator shake, you’re in the opening scene of a horror film.

Starring You.

Titled:

That’s No Bird!

But zombie birds alone aren’t enough to frighten you. The title needs something else. …

Perfect.

Revised Title:

That’s No Bird! That is Something Else...!

No more seagulls in the sky. No more humans on the shore. You’re on your own. It’s coming for you. It’s on it’s way. What is it?

It’s Something Else.

Really, it’s really something else.

-WYNN-

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